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Monday, June 28, 2010

The Boys of Elm Street

Monday's Man...er...Men: The guys from the Nightmare on Elm Street franchise.

Mom Smackley was recently watching a marathon of the Nightmare on Elm Street movies and I would watch parts of them with him. It hit me that there were some really good-looking guys in those movies and that it would fun to post the hot guys from Elm Street. Well, guess what. There really weren't as many as I thought. So I am going to feature the guys I thought were the best of the rest and then name the one guy I felt was the hottest of all.

A Nightmare on Elm Street was the feature film debut of some young actor by the name of Johnny Depp. He played the boyfriend next door to Heather Langenkamp. He was clean cut and he gets extra points for wearing a midriff-baring jersey.

You can't have the clean-cut boy next door in a movie without the resident bad boy, this time played by Nick Corri. Nothing hotter than to see a guy in just jeans and a leather jacket.

A Nightmare on Elm Street 2: Freddy's Revenge starred Mark Patton. I remember Mark from the film Come Back to the Five and Dime, Jimmy Dean, Jimmy Dean and thought he was hot then. He's not so bad in this outing especially when he's hanging out in the gym showers. More bonus points because he is an "out" actor.

Robert Rusler plays the school jock who is a rival at first for Mark's character, but through the movie becomes closer. Looking a little like Facts of Life-era George Clooney, Robert plays the comedy parts well, also.

Even the coach played by Marshall Bell has a DILF quality about him.

The real plus for this first sequel is the homoerotic undertones throughout the film. If you haven't seen the movie, then you need to rent it now to see what I mean. This added points to all three.

A Nightmare on Elm Street 3: Dream Warriors only had one guy that I thought was even remotely attractive (Mom Smackley disagrees, but this is my blog). Rodney Eastman plays the mute and sensitive Joey. There was some potential there.

A Nightmare on Elm Street 4: The Dream Master brought back Rodney Eastman as Joey...YAY!

It also added a David Boreanaz mini-me who acted like Christian Slater. His name was Andras Jones and he played the brother of the new main girl.

A Nightmare on Elm Street 5: The Dream Child featured Danny Hassel as the boyfriend. Danny was in Elm Street 4, but really didn't make that big of an impression. He looked better in Part 5 and was the only one worth mentioning in this outing.

Freddy's Dead: The Final Nightmare did not have one cute guy in it at all. In fact, the only one I could even bother posting about was Breckin Meyer. He only gets points because he got cuter when he got older.

Wes Craven's New Nightmare was also lacking in the hot guy department. The guy who played Heather Langenkamp's husband was the only one that I really thought was kinda cute. His name is David Newsom.

So there we have it. The hottest guys on Elm Street. After adding up all the points, Robert Rusler is the winner. He is the hottest of this horror franchise. If you get a chance, look him up in the projects he is currently doing. He is still looking fine!

I think next week I'll do this again with the Friday the 13th franchise. I seem to remember more hot guys in those films. Of course, it may just be me remembering my own summer camp days.

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